Dear Friends,
Have you noticed how the world is full of ‘them’? It seems that everywhere you look ‘they’ are
there, whether it’s on the TV or in the newspapers, at the clinic or in the
hospital, at school or college, at work or in the club, you can’t get away from
‘them’. Even in church, amongst the
neighbours, at home sometimes, ‘they’ appear.
(Now, before you read on, perhaps
you might take a moment to be aware of yourself, to ask who has come to mind as
‘them’, who ‘they’ are, and what you are thinking and feeling. What tone did you hear as you read that first
paragraph? Were we talking ethnicity,
religion, sexuality, age……?
I wonder what
criteria of difference came to mind. We
all carry the potential for prejudice and discrimination within us.)
The ‘them’ I have in mind, found in
all those places above, are the people we see as responsible, often to blame,
when things are not as we think they should be.
“They haven’t done
it.” “Is it any surprise when it’s left
to them?” “They’re only in it for what they
can get out of it.”
Depending on the context ‘they’ can
be national politicians, local government, managers, celebrities,
receptionists, teachers, doctors, social services, ministers, church or circuit
stewards, even sometimes family members.
And the way in which we use the words ‘they and ‘them’ is to apportion
blame, to place responsibility, and, often, to avoid thinking about our own
responsibilities and action (or inaction).
I’m not sure that to use the word
‘they’ in this way is very Christian.
I know that, in every walk of life and profession, there will be some
who do a worse job than others, who make wrong choices, whose decisions will
have unhelpful or downright dangerous consequences for others, sometimes
ourselves.
The use of ‘they’,
however, does two things. Firstly, it ignores the complexities of so many
situations, trying to simplify things down to it being ‘their’ fault. Often
‘they’ are balancing multiple demands with limited resources, and although the
outcomes may not be what we want, they are trying their best. Scapegoating ‘them’ masks underlying issues.
Secondly, the use of ‘they’ can be a way of avoiding ‘our’
responsibilities. If we’re waiting for
‘them’ to sort it out or change, then ‘we’ don’t need to do anything.
If ‘they’ is not a Christian word,
‘we’ most definitely is. “Love one
another as I have loved you.” “Love
your neighbour as yourself.” “I am the
vine, you are the branches…”
Commandments and images which show us who we are and how we are to be –
people called to live and love as scripture shows us, in community. We are called to live generously, to work for
justice, to welcome the stranger, to give our neighbours a glimpse of God’s
goodness, to be thankful in all circumstances.
The next time you’re tempted to
blame ‘them’, take a moment. Reflect on
‘their’ situation; maybe say a prayer for ‘them’. And ask yourself how you can respond in such
a way that God’s goodness, which will be present, can have its way.
Yours,
Rev Nick
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